about the coconut husk

When I thought about a name for this blog, the answer was clear.

Have you ever tried to get through a coconut husk?  Try it bare handed sometime; on the other hand don’t.  Better to get to the heart of it another way.  What I learned is that it takes ALOT of patience, strength, perseverance, resilience, belief, just to name a few.

After getting through it…

Getting to the heart of matters having spent seven years as a single Dad, and having been raised by one myself in Asia it took ALOT of the same.  My Dad and I are scuba divers and diving as often as we did in the South China Sea we would swim ashore, take off our gear and get out our dive knives out.  We would gather some coconuts and use our dive knives to get through the tough husks and just talked and spent time together.  We also certainly ate our share.   I learned so much from my Dad and the symbolism, now that I think about it of getting to the heart of matters and having meaningful times is akin to getting to the heart of all those coconuts with our dive knives. It takes awhile to get through the tough husk, but once you do it is certainly worth it.  He would often say to me “can’t have quality time without quantity time.”

What I also learned about coconut husks is that they can be used for messages.  In fact, in WWII, a coastwatcher scout named Biuku Gasa was the first of two from the Solomon Islands to reach the shipwrecked, wounded, and exhausted crew of Motor Torpedo Boat PT-109 commanded by future U.S. president John F. Kennedy. Gasa suggested, for lack of paper, delivering by dugout canoe a message inscribed on a husked coconut shell. This coconut was later kept on the president’s desk, and is now in the John F. Kennedy Library.  Also, the husks and shells of coconuts can be used fuel and are a source of charcoal.

With that in mind, consider ‘the coconut husk’ with a mission and as a message supplying fuel to:

–   Encourage, engage, and support single dads
–   Encourage, engage and support kids of single Dads (and Moms) as they go through growing up in a single parent home and help provide insights into family and other relationships going forward
–   Encourage, engage, and support ‘Third Culture Kids’ (TCKs) as they navigate and face adopting a country that becomes their home and significantly shapes their lives and who they are

All three of the above is part of who I am; would certainly welcome learning from you (e.g., moms and dads, single moms, single dads, single parent household kids, and TCKs) as well.  It has become evident that part of raising kids is being teachable myself.

Best Regards,



  1. Nice. And welcome to the blogging world.

    • Well said Ed, I look forward to reconnecting.

      Your cousin,
      Gil V.

  2. Bravo Ed. Looking forward to following along.
    Ken M.

    • Thanks for the note and encouragement Ken, and for following along!

  3. […] father after all, however he is truly a Dad.  My son is named after him.  Last year, I got him a coconut husk and thought we should share with […]

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